Friday, December 23, 2005

Solution to a Running-around Toddler

Since Zara could walk very well now, and prefers to walk about on her own without her hand being held; and because I'm getting old I have no energy to run after her, and I don't normally bring my maid along to look after her while I do my shopping, I have to find a solution to make sure she's always within a perimeter I want her to be. This is my solution :

She takes it very well. Happy to reach her hand out for me to strap the wrist strap on her, and doesn't mind the confined area she could roam. However, people around her wasn't as optimistic.

Samantha, "She's like a dog" My reply, "No, she's not, it's just like holding on to her hand" Alicia, "My mummy (King's Wife) never used that on me" My reply, "Because last time you have Aunty Nora (their previous maid) chasing after you every time we go out" (And they happily helped me to hold on to the harness with Zara leading the way after this) And you get passerby throwing glances at the evil mother me, and they try to discreetly point to our directions and get their companion to look our way as well. The worst of the lot comes from, who else, but Daddy. Daddy: *anger tone* Why are you doing this to her? Me : Why not? Daddy : She's like a dog on leash Me : Who said so. This is to keep her within a safe distant even if she wanted to run about Daddy : *still in anger tone* You are using it only because you bought it Me : *roll eyes and speak slowly* I BOUGHT IT BECAUSE I WANTED TO USE IT. Daddy : She looks so stupid Me : *really, what is his problem?* She doesn't! I don't have the energy to run after her. If you have, I remove the strap, you go chase after her than. Daddy : Sure! I'll do that. Yeah right.. After few minutes playing catching with Zara, he started carrying her. I guess, that's easier than chasing after her right? I don't see what is really wrong with using a harness on Zara. It allows her to roam freely, but within a safe distant from me. It makes sure that even if I was engrossed with browsing at something in the shop, she won't run away and get lost. Is it really that cruel? I hope I won't just succumb to pressure and toss the harness away.


Ah Pek said...


next time tie the leash on her neck. better to control.

yvy said...

ah pek!! so bad...

for me, the first impression like most ppl lar, why liddat - memang look like doggy leash but then when u think logically, it's good. maybe u should get one which doesnt look TOO much like a dog leash? i'm sure there are other types right? with the same function?

jazzmint said... hubby will 100% support this, cause he did it when faythe was crawling!!! To me, I think it's OK, nothing wrong with it, but maybe some ppl just can't accept it. Wait till u hear announcement like who's baby lost...then they know lah, this actually is very helpful.

Sabrina said...

Y not get a better looking one. At least ur hubby won't get so angry. There is another type which looks like a bag pack n it's really cute. At least ppl won't be staring at u and hubby won't get so upset.

Lazymama said...

I have seen many times those Ang Moh using the leash on their kids but Asian seldom do that.

YChing has went lost of my sight in the shopping mall few times when I wwnt shopping alone with her but it didn't come to mind to use the leash. Don't think YChing will agree to be leash on.

My solution is, don't go out alone with her. If want to go shopping, have to be on Sunday so that daddy can chase after her. :P

Anonymous said...

Hi, my name is Vanitha and I'm a (new) mum to a 6 month old (come January 1st) baby girl named Leisha. I enjoy reading your blog as I can relate to a lot of things you went through with Zara when she was younger. I learn a lot from your blog and I hope to be "prepared" (if there is such a thing) for whats in store for me in the near future.

As for the "leash", I'm 100% with you on this. I think it's feasible. Ignore those people I say. They're probably non-parents or even if they are, they're probably secretly thinking where to get one from. Btw, where does one get the "canggih" bagpack like "leash" from? It might come in handy when Leisha starts to walk/run.

Fannie said...

Agnes, I saw parents using that on kids.

My personal view (hope u don't mind), I won't do this to Ethyl cos it does look like walking a pet.

Anyway, if that is the best option...just go ahead and do it! :)

Allyfeel said...

It's just a perception. If it helps, why not. I was thinking to get one also for bb when he was younger, but then he got Sri to run after him.

Msau said...

how about put Zara in stroller? which oso tie her up..

I have the same problem energy to run after I took out the stroller which SQ refused to sit on when she start learn to walk..Amazingly SQ love to sit on it now and just looking around relaxing when I'm shopping around..haha..I think she now oledi know shopping is a tire exercise liao..:p

Anonymous said...

i agree with daddy

L B said...

As for me, I think you're absolutely resourceful! Your fear of losing Zara made you go against the norm, but the basis of that fear is well-founded. Toddlers can go missing, lost, or worse, kidnapped. Whatever the criticism, you know you're doing for it for Zara as much as for your own peace of mind, which is most important. Anyway, why are dogs on a leash in the first place? :-) Rhetoric question.

Sue said...

Actually, the harness is really a good thing, it lets them roam freely and explore while mummy can make sure that they are at a safe distance.

But for me, I'd rather chase after him than use it, coz it really does make them look like the household pet... I'm tempted to use it but I'd rather not :P


you remind me that i'm yet to get 2 harnesses for M&B. since we have 2, i let my hubby run after one and since then, he is supportive to get the harness.
you don't see Zara crying to be unleashed or make a big fuss over it- so, if there is no prob with kid, what's the prob with the adult, rite?

kelly said...

I agree with zara's papa..One of my relatives suggested me to use the harness as Qianyi's very active..but both my hubby and I think it's like walking a doggie..We prefer to chase after her...:)

sengkor said...

kids should run around freely ma..

Passerby A said...

I don't think it's cruel or anything like that... better to be safe than sorry. I've seen worse "leashes" where the harness is attached to the chest! Now that's crazy! Only the angmohs would use such those...

mom2ashley said...

i personally do not like it (no's just my opinion anyway) used to use the harness on sydney (our labrador retriever) as to use the harness/leash on ashley would be highly unlikely....but who knows? if i still do not have a maid by then..I may jjjjjuuust get one next time! hahahah..

pearlvanoyster said...

i've actually asked my aunt for the baby leash to be used on max when he can walk. think it's a good way to avoid max wandering too far from me

shiaulin said...
i saw this on the 自购目录 here in Beijing and yet to see anyone use it. ur intention is good but it does look like walking a pet leh.

yl said...

eh??? which animal gets leashed on their hind leg/foreleg??!! i think the harness on the wrist looks ok mahz... the chest one looks quite bad lahz...

Zara's Mama said...

Ah Pek,
This one baby la.. not some goat, using the method you use on your slave will not work ler.

The other one is strap on the shoulders, even more obvious.

Good, your hubby is so open minded. Not so kolot like mine.

today I tried the knapsack one in ToysRus, it's definitely better for Zara, but so many straps, I think Daddy will freak out more.

If Daddy around, I won't use now.. I'll keep it when he's not and I have to go shopping.

Thanks for visiting. You have a blog of your own as well?
and thanks for the support as well. ;)

haha, I guess that's most people's view point, no problem to state yours.
I'll still use it on Zara but only when Daddy is not with me.

See, you got Sri. If I bring my maid, sure I also won't need the harness.

When Zara is tired she doesn't mind the stroller, but when she's not, she preffers to walk. Especially when we're in a toy shop and I want to get something for her, it's hard to play catching with her there. :(

Are you Daddy in the first place? Or one of Daddy's friend?

Thanks for your support.
You are supporting me right? Because your last question made me scratch my head a bit. :P

haha, and most of the time, you have Sutini with you also.. so it helps with the chasing.

Two Little Fellas,
You are absolutely right! Who cares about the adults?? :P

Hehe.. I guess you normally go shopping with Papa? I sometimes go alone, so it helps me to 'keep tab' of her.

Seng Kor,
They should run freely at home, but out side in a mall, you don't know how many mask men like you out there to be looking for targets right?

The Diva,
Yeah, I tried it today as well. Too may straps, but that balance Zara better though. However, I'm not getting it. Daddy will probably freak out.

Hmm, it'll come in handy if you don't have a maid, and you like shopping without hubby.. like me.

Have you started using it?

China's kids are even more precious (b'cos of 1 child policy), how do the parents keep the babies close to them leh? But I guess, since the child is so precious, they won't mind running after the child..

true also hor.. where got animals get leashed on the wrist hor? Good point.. Next time I'll use that to argue with whoever is saying she looks like an animal on leash.

Jason said...

Its a very simple, effective and win-win situation. But Malaysians mind are narrow-minded and only think of what is in front of their eyes, so can't help it. I never thought of that idea also. Maybe I should strap my sister so that she can never touch my food.

Irene said...

Hailey has the exact same one in yellow too! She has a harness one too. That one is red and has Elmo on it, but hey she enjoys the freedom and if anyone wants to kidnap my kid, they wouldn't really be able to when she's attached right?

I guess it's one of the many blessings living in a caucasion society. They don't care. Plus, their dogs have clothes. So if they can dress their pets, I'll take whatever necessary measures to protect my child - if they choose to see my child as a pet, good for them. To me, she's my child.

And yeah, sometimes I go sans the papa, so the "leash" is awesome. Plus, now the hubby has carried her around for a few hours in the mall, he's good to let her run around too.

Perhaps, your hubby could hire you another "chase-the-baby" maid and trade it for the leash? :Op

L B said...

Oh you know I'm all yours - support wise anyway. LOL - I tend to chuck in a lil spanner from time to time. :-) Don't worry. MERRY CHRISTMAS to you & Zara & hubby!

blurblur said...

I've friends around me who are using this on their child. Although i've never used it on Damien (Daddy don't like, MEN!), i find that so long as both mother and child feels comfortable with it, who cares, right?? ;p

Vyvy said...

Agnes, Dec is just like Zara.. not only does he want to run around in the mall, he refused to be carried.. he just loves to wander around and touch everything.

I think if I'm gonna start using that, my mil will be the 1st one to kill me :p

I guess our eastern culture is still too conservative for such stuffs

Anonymous said...

i use the leash all the time my daughter dislike the backpack style. dont care what ppl think... as long as she's safe

Samm said...

I tot i'd buy one too, but frankly speaking, i prefer the body type. But me, i just use the nappy cloth and tie it round Gordon. Works fine till today. Me and my nappy cloth, got 1001 uses one. But having one is really better.

Dont bother about what others says, safety comes first. FIL's friend's very young child got ran over by a car because a family friend of the child took him for an outing. The child wouldnt let the uncle hold his hand, flung his dad's friend's hands off and ran towards the road and got killed.

I will not let anyone else take Gordon out. I'm not being frantic, but careful. Dont want to blame myself for anything unforseen events.

michelle said...

I tried this on my son, maybe it can work on your Zara. I actually hide, following closely behind him while he wander away. He got frightened when mummy was not around to be seen. Now he dare not move a inch away from mummy from then on.

No comments on the leash, it has it pros and cons.

Loc Kee said...

hmm... i wont ldo it to SS lo, i like Frredom and i want her to enjoy that too. Though I did the chsing, but most of time she is veli obedient. She will Hold our hands when walking.

We started training her to do that since veli beginning :>

yvy said...

samm!! thats awful!!! :( this better look like doggy than lose a kiddy. :(

Zara's Mama said...

thanks for the support. *bow*

yeah, who cares.

yeah, conservative eastern culture.

good to know that you are one of the user.

That is soooo traggic. Gosh, you are right about not wanting anybody to handle the child just in case you blame yourself for anything even though it may not be your fault..
I have to bear that in mind sometimes.

I think at this age, Zara has no fear yet. And when she's walking about, she really have no knowledge or don't care if we're there.
But your method will help when she's older..

Loc Kee,
SS like that good loh. No need to worry.

Yeah, what Samm mentioend was so traggic huh?

babe_kl said...

hey i started to use this on my boiboi few months back but after a few times he dun like the idea of being "confined". so now most of the times he will hold on to our hands even though he does this most times but there were times when i'm busy juggling whilst making payment, this strap is certainly useful.

i've got loads of stares but i dun the hell care, its better to be safe than sorry. i have a few mommies came up to us asking us where to get the strap too ahahaha i guess we have just started the fad ;-)

Twin said...

know what .. we wanted to get one for Darien but have not had the time to do it. He's such a hyper boy. When Denisha was younger, she's happy sitting in her stroller but since now she's bigger and at times, we don't bring the stroller out, so she'll resort to walking and when Darien sees that obviously he'll make lots of noise. And we'll end up having him walking as well. And when that happens, he'll be walking in all directions and we'll end up carrying him. Carrying a 12kg (more than apack of rice) baby is no joke ... he's really heavy. So we'll have to resort to that if he wants to walk. We didn't think of a harness cos its like holding on to a dog. Having a 'tot-a-long' wrist band is still not that bad.

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